tatra banka

I just have to comment on the banking system here in Bratislava.

We had to open an account with a local bank here, that bank would be Tatra  Banka. It is a fairly large national bank and they have branches located here the way they have StarBucks in Seattle, they are EVERYWHERE!

First, it took us 3 hours to open an account, yes 3!  To say that this bank takes security seriously is a gross understatement. I signed my signature two different ways and they actually noticed and almost didn’t approve a transfer of funds to my landlord.

Next, we opened our account in branch A, located pretty far from home. So we had them send the credit card to another location, B, closer to home. When I was told to go to branch B to pick up the card, I went to branch C, because I didn’t realize that there were 3 (3!), branches within blocks of one another. So I went to branch C, was told to go to branch B, but saw branch D first, was then told to go to branch B. Didn’t see the door to branch B since it was hidden (I swear it was like a secret passageway, no sign or anything) and went back to D. I saw that D was closed. Went to branch E the next day with the landlord, but they said my signature card wasn’t on file yet so I still couldn’t move funds. The next day, landlord and I went back to branch D (since I thought this was where to go), but then realized it wasn’t a branch but just some office of the bank. Went back to branch B, my landlord found the secret door, but we went upstairs to floor 1 (since ground floor is 0), and then rang some random, unmarked doorbell to where the personal banker was that had my credit card. We were now in Hogwarts. Who knew!?

So this banker gives me my credit card. I need this card to use internet banking. Mind you, you can’t just log in to use their internet banking, you have to actually apply, with a separate application, to use their internet banking feature. This new card I am given is the first step in accessing my Tatra Banka account. First, I log on using a 7-digit user name and then enter a 16-alphanumeric code for my password. Then I insert the new credit card into this little calculator thingy they gave me when I opened the account. This piece of hardware and credit card give a new code that you then have to enter. Only I couldn’t get this far because I keep getting an error on the calculator thingy. But I still have about 5 other passwords and PINS and authentication codes to enter before I can actually get to my account online.

Are you people serious?!