Author: mama

 

If you know me, you know I LOVE tomato soup. Well, I just made a batch and it was so freakin’ good I had to document! (not my pic either, but that’s what it basically looked like)  Best part, only about 55 calories!  Unfortunately, I didn’t write down exact amounts, but hopefully this will help me remember…

 

I used a box of Pomi tomatoes.

 

We used these while in Slovakia and I don’t know why but they just taste so much better than regular canned tomatoes (use it in all my spag/tomato sauces now), but I’m sure canned would work too. The box will make 3 servings of soup (2 ladle scoops per serving).

 

Saute 1-2 tablespoons  of chopped garlic in just a bit of the tomatoes until the garlic is soft

Add box of tomatoes (get them in the organic section)

Add (half box) water until desired consistency.

Then generously season to taste with sea salt, ground pepper, dried thyme, little nutmeg, minced dried onion, garlic powder and about 1-2 large handfuls of large, fresh, basil leaves chopped up.

I also added 6 tablespoons of milk for just a touch of creamy without the guilt

Simmer for at least 30 minutes.

Eat with guilt-free grissini bread sticks and voila, YUMMY!

Yeah, second children truly get ripped off! Not as many pictures or videos as the first. I can say though that at least I have been keeping up with his monthly, Dear Ian, letters. Getting them compiled is another story (Skye’s is almost done though, ha, three years later).  Since the next couple of weeks will be busy, I am going to post his birth story (since I never posted is last year) now even though his birthday isn’t until next week.  (BTW love Google documents! I wrote his story right after he was born there, but never post here).  I guess I’m feeling a little emotional about Ian getting older, as we say goodbye to baby-ness, probably forever. It’s a little heart-wrenching leaving your childbearing years, but I am so thrilled for the years to come.

Without further delay…

Ian Birth Story

I was 35 weeks and 2 days pregnant when I started having irregular contractions on Sunday, April 11. They felt more like cramps than contractions since I only had back contractions with Skye. Still, they were pretty constant, painful and irritating. I went up to Dads in Park City for dinner around 4 and Benjam stayed at home to game with his friends for his birthday… Continue reading “Ian’s birth story”

I saw this online and the more I see it, the more I can’t stop laughing at it. This is not Ian, nor did Skye do this. The kid is clueless and you can just envision the toddler playfully putting them on his head. Poor kid :(

“My older daughter has a band aid obsession, and she put a bunch on his head. And I have yet to figure out a way to get them off without ripping out his hair. I removed 2 so far and he cried to no end. I felt bad for him. :(  ”

So there is some baby out there with a bunch of band aids on his head for no particular reason, but his older sister, and Mom can’t find a humane way to get them out, so he just continues to be Band Aid Head. Love it!

We went to Skye’s preschool orientation yesterday. She will be going 4 hours a week at the U preschool program, which I think will be perfect for her. I am really excited about the program. I really like their philosophies, experienced teachers, high accreditation and saturation of academics through their affiliation with the U. It’s a Co-op, which I also find very interesting and am pleased that we will have a chance to be apart of the classroom setting and see her progress as well as school environment up close (not to mention the discount).  During the orientation, Skye’s teacher was explaining to us while we do our co-op days that we are the ones that will need to have control: the teacher got out a bottle of Elmer’s glue, and just like a toddler would do, she turned it over and dumped out the entire bottle. She explained that this is the kids’ art and that we are not to interfere with it. She also did this with a whole bottle of glitter!  I just loved it!  It really showed their commitment to harboring their creativity, at the expense of cheap art supplies. I know it will be difficult for Skye in the beginning but I am really counting on their experience to help her get through it. I have been scouting preschools for a while now, even while we were still in Europe, but when I saw this place, it just clicked. Every parent has that “thing” that they don’t want to compromise on, be it food choices or discipline or whatever, and education is that “thing” for me. So I am happy that I found a place that feels right to me and for her (and our budget).

That said, I can’t believe we are entering the “school years” and have kids of that age. I know Skye is still very young as far as schooling goes, but knowing that from here on out for the next 20 years, it will be nonstop. I feel like part of me should be sad about this, and I guess a small part is, but on the other hand, I can’t wait for her to start having new challenges and experiences that we simply can’t provide for her at home. I’ve always imagined the hustle and bustle of the school age as part of my fantasies when we going through all of the infertility stuff; that it somehow paints that Rockefeller portrait of the family.

Anyways, she starts on August 21st. What will she wear!?!!

Just had to document how much Skye hates anything in her hair. I did however get her to wear a headband for 2.2 seconds before she wanted to take it out and put it on herself before taking it off completely.

Mr. Angry Boy (ok, that’s just his newborn nickname until he started to smile a bit),  is already 3 months old. There is no doubt how much he has changed our family dynamic for the good, and now our family feels complete. So much so that when I look back at family pics with just Skye, it looks incomplete and for a second I wonder where Ian is and why he’s not in the picture.

Found some hilarious things parents say to their toddlers. I can totally see Benjam or I saying these things completely calmly and in all seriousness:

“I know it’s tempting to put things in your bottom, but it’s not okay!”

“Please stop stuffing lettuce in your ears.”

“Yes, I can see that you have poo poo all over your fingers.”

“please stop stepping on your brother”

“Honey, you have to pull down your underpants when you sit on the potty!”

“Don’t pee on your sister!”

“No you cannot trade your sister for ice cream.”

“Don’t lick the floor.”

“No, Hannah. Dogs don’t need to curl their eyelashes. They don’t need lipstick either.”

“Because 2-year-olds are to little to drive cars. Throwing a fit will not help your case for driving us home from fireworks.”

“No you can’t have coffee for dinner…or ever, for that matter.”

“If I could somehow figure out a way for you to jump into the TV, I’d be happy to let you go to Pizza Planet with Woody and Buz. Until then, you’ll have to settle for Dominoes.”

And my personal favorite,

“What happened to the piece of poop that was in the diaper?”

How is it possible for time to pass by so ridiculously slow yet to suddenly find myself gawking at the number 8?   Has it really been 8 months since mom died?  What a blur. I know some of that is from having a newborn, but grief is a tricky beast that plays many pranks on you. What I think I’ve found most surprising still is my failure to accept the finality of her absence. Sometimes I’ll say a quick prayer in passing on my way to sleep that she will come to me in my dreams just so I can talk to her again; see her alive again. Sometimes when I haven’t had anyone call me for a while, I absentmindedly think, well, at least I can always count on mom calling, before I catch myself saying, oh yeah. The stinging, uniform truth about death is actually quite simple; it just comes down to missing her. I miss her so much, it’s simply painful and nothing else. To have someone play a constant role in your entire life, to suddenly not, will take the rest of my life to get over and a void has been created never to be filled again.

I think one saving grace in all of this,  something that has provided me with real joy again, is my children. Dear God what pure, happiness they bring!   They have been given to me at a time in my life when I couldn’t have needed them more. They will never, ever know what their beautiful faces have done for me at this time in my life. They have given me a reason to hope again, to come out of the darkness. I am all too aware that death lingers only a few  minutes away from all of us at any given time. But the love that they have brought back into my life has allowed me to fight off that fear a little more each day, because I don’t want to live in fear, fear of losing everything and everyone close to me. I want to bathe in their cuteness and not in the fear of losing it.

So on this 8 month anniversary, I don’t think it is ironic that in remembering my own mom, I am giving huge thanks that I myself am a mom. I feel like motherhood has brought me closer to her, helped me understand her a little more, which in turn only makes me sadder in the end, but I am grateful nonetheless for the new insights. There are moments when the injustice of having to live through anyone’s death still angers me, but a bouncing Skye bursting into the bedroom in the morning or watching my new son try and find his hand to his mouth, sweeps that anger away and leaves overwhelming, profound love. I know mom would be so happy about that. She always used to comment on the look that baby-Skye used to give me, when she would recognize her one and only mother; that look of relief that says, hey, I know you and I am happy and comfortable that you are here. I can now see that same look with Ian, but instead of brushing that fact aside, I feel closer to my mom, and Ian, all at once.

So, while I still long for her terribly, I am glad that I am able to have something else to smile about in my life when so much else is missing.