Welker Fam

We went to Skye’s preschool orientation yesterday. She will be going 4 hours a week at the U preschool program, which I think will be perfect for her. I am really excited about the program. I really like their philosophies, experienced teachers, high accreditation and saturation of academics through their affiliation with the U. It’s a Co-op, which I also find very interesting and am pleased that we will have a chance to be apart of the classroom setting and see her progress as well as school environment up close (not to mention the discount).  During the orientation, Skye’s teacher was explaining to us while we do our co-op days that we are the ones that will need to have control: the teacher got out a bottle of Elmer’s glue, and just like a toddler would do, she turned it over and dumped out the entire bottle. She explained that this is the kids’ art and that we are not to interfere with it. She also did this with a whole bottle of glitter!  I just loved it!  It really showed their commitment to harboring their creativity, at the expense of cheap art supplies. I know it will be difficult for Skye in the beginning but I am really counting on their experience to help her get through it. I have been scouting preschools for a while now, even while we were still in Europe, but when I saw this place, it just clicked. Every parent has that “thing” that they don’t want to compromise on, be it food choices or discipline or whatever, and education is that “thing” for me. So I am happy that I found a place that feels right to me and for her (and our budget).

That said, I can’t believe we are entering the “school years” and have kids of that age. I know Skye is still very young as far as schooling goes, but knowing that from here on out for the next 20 years, it will be nonstop. I feel like part of me should be sad about this, and I guess a small part is, but on the other hand, I can’t wait for her to start having new challenges and experiences that we simply can’t provide for her at home. I’ve always imagined the hustle and bustle of the school age as part of my fantasies when we going through all of the infertility stuff; that it somehow paints that Rockefeller portrait of the family.

Anyways, she starts on August 21st. What will she wear!?!!

Skye had a lot she wanted to tell people today, so here it is.

nnvvcnvnvnvm,vmvv,mnvmvbn bnmgbmmmmmmcvv mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmv vv mmmmmmmmmm mcx,cc,.admashjsdcv,mv,mvmnvvmvnvv nmnvb gvgggggggggggggg8uu8herdwi,fjshfjd fj8djcbydjvchjs cklpbisbewkjhhcn vcnvcbvjfjdhjfdknm dnadiadu mn .,hjj.jj/.jj j,uryt8457,l wwww05e  dfc fdhujf34ruh

(Ed. Note- It may not seem like a lot, but after translation, it expands to about 2 or 3 books worth of information.)

Just had to document how much Skye hates anything in her hair. I did however get her to wear a headband for 2.2 seconds before she wanted to take it out and put it on herself before taking it off completely.

Mr. Angry Boy (ok, that’s just his newborn nickname until he started to smile a bit),  is already 3 months old. There is no doubt how much he has changed our family dynamic for the good, and now our family feels complete. So much so that when I look back at family pics with just Skye, it looks incomplete and for a second I wonder where Ian is and why he’s not in the picture.

Found some hilarious things parents say to their toddlers. I can totally see Benjam or I saying these things completely calmly and in all seriousness:

“I know it’s tempting to put things in your bottom, but it’s not okay!”

“Please stop stuffing lettuce in your ears.”

“Yes, I can see that you have poo poo all over your fingers.”

“please stop stepping on your brother”

“Honey, you have to pull down your underpants when you sit on the potty!”

“Don’t pee on your sister!”

“No you cannot trade your sister for ice cream.”

“Don’t lick the floor.”

“No, Hannah. Dogs don’t need to curl their eyelashes. They don’t need lipstick either.”

“Because 2-year-olds are to little to drive cars. Throwing a fit will not help your case for driving us home from fireworks.”

“No you can’t have coffee for dinner…or ever, for that matter.”

“If I could somehow figure out a way for you to jump into the TV, I’d be happy to let you go to Pizza Planet with Woody and Buz. Until then, you’ll have to settle for Dominoes.”

And my personal favorite,

“What happened to the piece of poop that was in the diaper?”

How is it possible for time to pass by so ridiculously slow yet to suddenly find myself gawking at the number 8?   Has it really been 8 months since mom died?  What a blur. I know some of that is from having a newborn, but grief is a tricky beast that plays many pranks on you. What I think I’ve found most surprising still is my failure to accept the finality of her absence. Sometimes I’ll say a quick prayer in passing on my way to sleep that she will come to me in my dreams just so I can talk to her again; see her alive again. Sometimes when I haven’t had anyone call me for a while, I absentmindedly think, well, at least I can always count on mom calling, before I catch myself saying, oh yeah. The stinging, uniform truth about death is actually quite simple; it just comes down to missing her. I miss her so much, it’s simply painful and nothing else. To have someone play a constant role in your entire life, to suddenly not, will take the rest of my life to get over and a void has been created never to be filled again.

I think one saving grace in all of this,  something that has provided me with real joy again, is my children. Dear God what pure, happiness they bring!   They have been given to me at a time in my life when I couldn’t have needed them more. They will never, ever know what their beautiful faces have done for me at this time in my life. They have given me a reason to hope again, to come out of the darkness. I am all too aware that death lingers only a few  minutes away from all of us at any given time. But the love that they have brought back into my life has allowed me to fight off that fear a little more each day, because I don’t want to live in fear, fear of losing everything and everyone close to me. I want to bathe in their cuteness and not in the fear of losing it.

So on this 8 month anniversary, I don’t think it is ironic that in remembering my own mom, I am giving huge thanks that I myself am a mom. I feel like motherhood has brought me closer to her, helped me understand her a little more, which in turn only makes me sadder in the end, but I am grateful nonetheless for the new insights. There are moments when the injustice of having to live through anyone’s death still angers me, but a bouncing Skye bursting into the bedroom in the morning or watching my new son try and find his hand to his mouth, sweeps that anger away and leaves overwhelming, profound love. I know mom would be so happy about that. She always used to comment on the look that baby-Skye used to give me, when she would recognize her one and only mother; that look of relief that says, hey, I know you and I am happy and comfortable that you are here. I can now see that same look with Ian, but instead of brushing that fact aside, I feel closer to my mom, and Ian, all at once.

So, while I still long for her terribly, I am glad that I am able to have something else to smile about in my life when so much else is missing.

We welcomed little Ian into the world after a sudden and intense labor on Tues., April 13th, 2010 @ 2:40a.

Chelsea began to have sporadic contraction pains on Sunday, and everything pointed to false labor. Early Monday morning the frequency and intensity became too much to bear and we headed off to the hospital at around 5-6a. They placed her on the monitor and discovered she was dilating. Apparently the false labor wasn’t as false as we had thought.

After making sure she was progressing at a pretty good pace, they admitted her and get everything ready for a swift delivery of a pre-term baby. After they got her the epidural, the contractions spread out, and her rapid dilation all but ceased. We were hoping it would stop altogether and we could go home and let the little one cook a bit longer, but after discovering an infection in Chelsea which was affecting the baby, they induced labor.

Chelsea delivered the little 5lb. 13oz., 19.5 in. baby boy early Tues. morning, and they immediately took him for testing and observation. Having had prior issues this pregnancy, Chelsea had been given a steroid shot to help the little guy’s lungs develop a bit faster, so he was ahead of the curve in that department and has no issues breathing. And although his muscle tone was a bit low right after birth, he has since recovered a lot of that.

Both baby and mother are doing amazing, and are eagerly awaiting the infection test results for Ian before being released into the wild.

I found some notes from our Italy/Austria trip last year. Ahh, what a great trip!

THE SIGHTS:
The undeniable history the coliseum represents
Stumbling onto the choir inside St Paul’s Basicalla and hearing the voices bounce off those decorated, marble walls
Ancient Rome ruins amidst modern day Rome
The view atop the “castle” in Rome
Vatican City and St Peter’s Basicalla and its own history in the making
The gargantuan “monument” of Rome
The presence of the Pantheon
The train ride along the coast of the Mediterranean
Swimming in the perfect waters of the Mediterranean sea; warm, shallow, sandy, small waves
It was a tragedy not visiting the charming, rock-hugging cities of Cinque Terra, but it was nice train trip up the coast and seeing them all, albeit whizzing by
The globe collection and astronomical tool collection at the Leonardo Science museum of Milano
The train ride through the Alps and their absolute, breath-taking beauty and formidable stature
The largest castle/fortress of Salzburg, it just kept going and going
Indescribable greenness and vastness of Hellibrum
The intricate trick fountains of the previous
The stream right beneath our hotel in Salzburg to help conquer and noise and heat at night

THE PEOPLE
Children playing soccer in the quintessential piazza of La Spezia
The very, kind man who saw the exhaustion on all of our faces in Milano
The two old people, indepently, trying to help us out with the buses outside of the small village of Livorno. We told them we didn’t speak Italiano, but they just kept going, trying to be so helpful, it was so endearing.
Austrian lady on the train who told us we should go to Austria in the wintertime because the coldness is good for your health
A little Italian girl, 7 or 8 who kept trying to play with Skye on the beach
The lifeguard of the Pisa hotel who told us we had to wear caps and was completely stumped when Benjam asked why; it’s just the way it is
The tour lady of the colosseum
Holy cow, does Europe know how to do a “continental breakfast”!

FAMILY
The dinner we had in a quaint alleyway-street in Rome; bottle of wine, delicious brushetta, scrummy pasta and the good spirits of all of us
Swimming with Skye in the Mediterranean
Benjam showing Skye around the Leonardo Museum
Watching movies on the tiny laptop with headphones as Skye slept in the early evening
Watching the walking thing click with Skye on the grounds of the park and hotel garden
Skye holding both of our hands and swinging her, all over Italy and Austria
Dinner in Tirrentia, yummy lobster ravioli’s and best ever tiramisu while Skye slurped, or tried, a plate of spaghetti
Complete surrender when at the trains scheduling, cancellations, delays, ok not a highlight, but won’t be forgotten
Sleeping on the floor in Salzburg, with Skye sprawled in between us in the morning
Walking back to the Salzburg hotel at late dusk, Skye just jabbering away as the streets were emptying
The pizza and beer Benjam and I shared on the balcony overlooking the water as Skye napped
Watching Benjam try to outwit the trick fountains
Eating ice cream along the grounds of St Paul’s basicalla
Eating gelato by the Trevi fountains with the swarms of other tourists doing the same and hoping the water would cool us off. It didn’t.

NOT SO HIGHLIGHTS
Our sometimes inability to entertain a toddler on her umpteenth train ride and stoller confinement
Skye meltdown on the plane to Rome
Skye’s meltdown from Rome to Tirrenia/Pisa
Skye’s meltdown from Tirrenia to Genova
Skye’s meltdown from Genova to Milan
Skye’s meltdown in Milan, hence why we stayed overnight there, unplanned
Skye’s meltdown from Milan to Salzburg
Skye’s meltdown from Vienna to Bratislava and unacceptance of it all any longer
The uncountable trains, buses, trains, taxi’s, metro’s and trains
2 days of expensive transportation and accommodation in the middle of the trip, when the big Italian train explosion happened and jammed up everything. What a tragic accident though.
Our very first taste of Italy; stale, old, pizza that had apparently sat under the heat lamp for hours
Missing out on the Sistine Chapel because of  2 hour wait in the sun
Missing out on La Spezia/Portoverne/Cinqe Terra because of train problems